My sister,has power of attorney (POA)and cares for my uncle in Mass. My other sister and I live in California. My uncle receives $10k/month in annuities and retirement monies that go in to his checking account. All three of us sisters are on that account, but Mary-Lou drains that account every month and has been doing so for over 2 years. She buys gold, silver, and anything to spend that money every month. How can we stop her? She is robbing my uncle and stealing our potential inheritance from us and our children and my grandchildren. My uncle never would have wanted this, but dementia has set in and I'm sure he has no idea of what Mary-Lou is doing.
Lawrence S.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
If you are a potential heir, when you're uncle has lost capacity to manage his affairs, you have a right by law to an accounting as to his financial matters; to keep an eye on any future vested interest in the estate. She has a duty to account and a duty of loyalty and care as to all future beneficiaries of the estate. I would contact an Elder Law Attorney to help you make sure she understands this duty to you and all other beneficiaries.
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I am concerned that my brother has confused and isolated my mother from me (I live in another state), deliberately causing a rift through "brainwashing", and then signed her up for hospice, which is now the fast-track to death for her. He stands to benefit financially and has a bad history of drug use and violence, intimidation. He has been able to get mom to allow him to be the power of atty (POA) and executor of a fairly substantial estate. I have reported him to authorities but since she was tricked into hospice and is very gullible, it seems there is nothing that anyone will do. The most recent issue is severe pain in her left side that they have no idea what it is from and will not order tests for. Brother agreed and sounded happy. "This is IT" he told me (the opportunity for her to die). I am a senior also and cannot take this sort of worry and stress. No one where they live will help. Adult Protective Services nor police. They just get bamboozled and go away. This is appalling to me but I feel I have no other options but to do nothing more. I have tried everything I know of.
jodi B.
, answers:
Dear 'abusive brother..' sibling.
I deeply feel for your situation. There are safeguards--even in Hospice. Contact the Hospice agency social worker assigned to mom's case. Contact mom's doctor and state your concerns. You could also contact a local ombudsman in their area and relate the details, asking for their f/u. There are also APS agencies (Adult Protective Agency) should you wish to go there. Are you allowed to visit, talk to your mom? You may wish to speak to her about your concerns in a loving way. BTW, I personally have had many Hospice patients who felt they actually lived longer because of good support and symptom management in end of life. It is not wrong to support someone's wish to stop aggressive/curative treatment because she is tired of fighting chronic issues or progressing acute issues. Is this mom's wish? Do you have a copy of mom's DPOA/DPAHC?
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Roto-Rooter charged my mother $600 to fix a faucert. I think the company took advantage of my mother because of her age. Isn't this elder-abuse, overcharging an elderly person? What can I do?
Daniel R.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
I doubt that your fact situation arises to the level of elder abuse which is a criminal offense. Your mother may have been taken advantage of and i suggest that you use this as a motivation to increase oversight for her safety and well being. I realize that this is easier said than done but, this type of event will continue to occur if she continues to make her own decisions without oversight by you or other family members. Pray that one of the phone solicitors or sweepstakes companies do not get her on their lists. Her contact information will be sold to others in the exploitation business. It is an ongoing battle to insulate and protect our aging loved ones who are too trusting and subject to manipulation by the unscrupulous.
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I filed a complaint against Ashley Court, a special care home, in Brighton, MI where my husband was a resident. They were found quilty of 4 violations. In a newspaper article they used his name, gave behaviors he exhibited, taked about going to a hospital for drug changes for violence. Described him as their most challening resident. My friends and I are upset & feel this violates HIPPA.
What actions can I take?
What actions can I take?
Laurel F.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
You can file a complaint with the state ombudsperson for long term care, and with the MI dept of consumer and regulatory affairs if this place is state licensed as an adult foster care home or home for aged for HIPAA violation (it sounds like 4 violations were already substantiated, if this disclosure is already part of that don't bother) You would need to consult an attorney as to whether it is worthwhile to file a civil suit for damages---no question there is a privacy violation here, but proving that there are damages associated with the disclosure is something counsel would have to advise.
Also to add that even with blatant HIPAA violation like this, enforcing penalties is not easy, and while there are substantial fines, judgments have historically only been against major large providers and multiple persons affected, such as patient's social security numbers and medical records on a laptop that was lost or stolen. You'll be hard pressed to find a government entity responsible for enforcing HIPAA to take this on. I would think that the newspaper that ran the story might have some liability running your loved ones names and details like that without family consent. Just beware that often facilities have a fine print blanket photography and publication consent that you may have inadvertently signed as part of the admission paperwork. If so, you have no grounds for a complaint.
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My Dad's wife abused him financially (she renewed & ordered new credit cards in his name when he was incompetent)emotionally, medically (interfered with proper dosing of medication) for years before he died. i know that there is proof but i can,t get my hands on it. What options do I have for prosecuting these perceived abuses?
Ronald A.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
You will need to proceed with a petition to have him placed under conservatorship.Once you obtain control, you will be able to proceed to rescind the agreements she has made on his behalf.
Dennis S.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
I am glad to see you use the term perceived abuses, as it is quite possible that everything you described is perfectly legal for a wife to do for her incapacitated husband. To prove elder abuse with just the two examples you have given would be impossible. If you think you have some stronger examples of actual physical or financial abuse, you can contact the police (or Adult Protective Services) (but that is unlikely to result in any prosecution, as this would likely be characterized as a family dispute) or you can contact an attorney who specializes in elder abuse cases. The attorney would evaluate your case as to whetehr there is enopugh there to take on the case. From what you described in your initial question, you do not have enough at this time.
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A family member that I know of, extracts money from an elder by having her giving him large amount of money each time he takes her to the bank.
With whom should I speak about this issue? How can I respond to this abuse?
Terry B.
, answers:
What you describe is financial abuse and should be reported to Adult Protective Services. Financial abuse is difficult to prove so when reporting the abuse give as much information and evidence as you can.
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My father has been under heavy medication over the pas 8 years. He has had triple bypass surgery and had a shunt put in his brain due to a neurological condition called NPH. He was told by his doctors not to sign any important papers during this time.
Unfortunately, he did not heed this warning. A grandson came around during this time and coaxed my father into cosigning his student loan under a heavy interest rate. This was done during all this other stuff that was happening. My mother was unaware that he signed the student loan. At this point, the Grandson is not paying it back and my father never should have signed it for medical and financial reasons. What can we do to get my father off student loan and make grandson responsible?
Unfortunately, he did not heed this warning. A grandson came around during this time and coaxed my father into cosigning his student loan under a heavy interest rate. This was done during all this other stuff that was happening. My mother was unaware that he signed the student loan. At this point, the Grandson is not paying it back and my father never should have signed it for medical and financial reasons. What can we do to get my father off student loan and make grandson responsible?
Cynthia P.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
An attorney would need to advise, however I do believe you can send a letter from the doctor as to your father's inability to complete legal documents to the Education Department. That may be all that is required.....
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My elderly mother, who lives in another state, is on a fixed income and gives almost half her income to charities. How can I stop this? She does not tell me the truth and becomes very defensive when asked.
Laurel F.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
Stacey's response is excellent. If your mother is found to be capable of managing her affairs, show her some articles or documentaries of how some charities misuse their funds and how little goes to the people in need and perhaps she would rethink this. AARP and Nightline are good sources. If she is giving to legitimate charities with good management, then what I have done with clients is have them do a breakdown of their monthly income and expenses so they have a visual, a pie chart, showing how much they are giving away and sacrificing their own lifestyle/wellbeing in the process. Sometimes seeing it in black in white makes it more real, I've had clients shocked to find out how much they were giving because it was $10 here and there. I find many older people were brought up with tithing which is admirable, but once on a fixed income it can become a hardship, and in these cases getting a "dispensation" to lower their giving from the pastor can do wonders (but be sure to talk to him/her in advance-- one time that it backfired on me). Also, if there are grandchildren, perhaps this could become a family activity with grandma donating time instead of money to a family favorite cause.
Stacey E.
, answers:
That's a very frequent question and many elderly people are easily exploited financially. First step would be to take her to the doctor and have him do a thorough exam to determine the extent of her dementia. S/he can then decide whether your mother has the "capacity" to handle her money. If he determines not, the next step would be for you to pursue becoming her representative payee via Social Security, her bank, etc. The doctor has to sign a form indicating he agrees she can't handle her finances & then her SS checks could go to you.
You could get on her bank accounts if she lets you but it sounds like she won't.
If all else fails, you need to work with the courts to get conservatorship. You fill out paperwork (not hard) as does the doctor. The judge then determines if your mother has "competency" to handle her finances. You & all other involved parties would go to court and let the judge decide. She could still have a say in where the money goes but she'd be doing it WITH you instead of alone. For example, each month you could sit with her and write out the checks for bills and you both sign them. That way she still feels involved but you're really managing it. When she can't do it anymore it's an easy transition to you just doing it all. It's not easy but you have to control her assets.
Hope that helps!
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If you are physically abused by someone younger, at what age would one become a victim of elder abuse? When might elder abuse charges be filed?
Ellen M.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
One is considered an elder for elder abuse charges when one reaches 60 years of age and meets the following definition found in Chapter 825 of Florida Statutes. 'Elderly person' means a person 60 years of age or older who is suffering from the infirmities of aging as manifested by advanced age or organic brain damage, or other physical, mental, or emotional dysfunctioning, to the extent that the ability of the person to provide adequately for the person's own care or protection is impaired.
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I don't live in the same town as my elderly mother. I am concerned for her, though, and want to know what measures I need to take.
You see, my sister calls my elderly mother and harasses her over the phone. My mother doesn't want to talk or see my sister.
Is this considered abuse? Should I consider getting a restraining order so she stays away from her?
You see, my sister calls my elderly mother and harasses her over the phone. My mother doesn't want to talk or see my sister.
Is this considered abuse? Should I consider getting a restraining order so she stays away from her?
Nathan Z.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
It could be considered abuse, depending upon the particular circumstances. A restraining order could possibly be appropriate. It is difficult to ascertain all the particulars via posted messages. If you call our office we would be happy to discuss your mom's situation in more detail.
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My elderly mom who is a spiritual person is being exploited by a private duty care giver. This person has stolen from her and continues to come around even after being requested not to. To whom can I report this abuse? How can I stop it?
Peggy M.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
Report it to your Area Agency on Aging department of Adult Protective Services. They will send someone out to investigate and ask your mother if she wants to go forth with a complaint.
Rachel K.
, answers:
You can call Adult Protective Services for Cuyahoga county but most likely you will need to file for guardianship over her and get a restraining order. Please feel free to contact our office for an appointment.
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My father passed on Oct. 2006. He left behind two substantial bank accounts for my 90 year old mom, his wife. My brother has managed to appropriate for himself, all of these monies intended for our mom. I'm the executor of the will, but have never done anything about this possible theft in order to avoid family disagreements. I'm looking for the best way to handle this situation.
jane k.
, answers:
For your brother to access the funds, is he the POA for your Mom? Was the POA for your Dad? As the Executrix of the Estate, you will need to file the Will in Probate before you do anything else. I am a Geriatric Care Manager and I work with Elder Law Attorneys. I would consult with one ASAP. Good luck.
Candice B.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
If you need monies for Mom's care and expenses now or in the future and there is none left who is going to pay for Mom's needs? Is your brother's name or yours on Mom's checkbook/bank accounts? If not, how is he obtaining the funds?
Since you are executor of the will, I believe you have the authority as to where these funds are appropriated and should contact the attorney who set up the will immediately. You may have a case of elderly financial exploitation.
I wouldn't worry about family disagreements, your brother certainly isn't, and Mom's future needs come first. Please contact us for any further questions or care for Mom.
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I moved in to my address in Quincy in 2008. I was living in a disabled apt. I moved to another Quincy Housing disabled apartment in September of 2012.
To move me, an EMT and a Police officer dragged me out of my home cutting me in the process. They really didn't care how they treated me and I have the pictures to prove it. A couple of days later City Nurses and my doctor suggested I got to Quincy Medical Center and then be transferred to Tufts Hospital in Boston.
But instead of that happening I got admitted to Quincy Medical Center. I kept on asking when my transfer was coming. Finally they had transferred me, I thought I was going to Tufts like they swore would happen. Instead I ended up going to Norwood Hospital where I was locked in with Alzheimers or dementia patients.
I went through hell there. A man tried to punch me several times, I had a dirty rag that would go across my food. From that day I refused to eat in their dining room. Nurses I approached about problems wouldn't listen to me. I had men going into my room and peeing on the floors. Some would take everything off. I was pure negligence up there. I call this abuse.
What can I do? What type of action can I take now?
To move me, an EMT and a Police officer dragged me out of my home cutting me in the process. They really didn't care how they treated me and I have the pictures to prove it. A couple of days later City Nurses and my doctor suggested I got to Quincy Medical Center and then be transferred to Tufts Hospital in Boston.
But instead of that happening I got admitted to Quincy Medical Center. I kept on asking when my transfer was coming. Finally they had transferred me, I thought I was going to Tufts like they swore would happen. Instead I ended up going to Norwood Hospital where I was locked in with Alzheimers or dementia patients.
I went through hell there. A man tried to punch me several times, I had a dirty rag that would go across my food. From that day I refused to eat in their dining room. Nurses I approached about problems wouldn't listen to me. I had men going into my room and peeing on the floors. Some would take everything off. I was pure negligence up there. I call this abuse.
What can I do? What type of action can I take now?
Ramsey B.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
I would need more information before I could advise whether you have legal grounds to bring a legal action. For example how old are you? Why were you forcibly removed from your Quincy Housing? What was your medical diagnosis at that time? What was your medical diagnosis at Quincy Hospital? What treatment did you receive at Quincy Hospital? Where are you living now?
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I need help finding protection for my mother's assets, and for herself. I live out-of-state from my mother. My mother has dementia. It is clear to me, that her third husband is stealing her money? Given that I live far away from her, how can I protect my mother from him?
John T G.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Since it sounds like your mother lacks capacity to execute a new Durable Power of Attorney, I would advise you to consult with an experienced Elder Law Attorney regarding obtaining a Conservatorship over her assets. The problem that you may encounter, however, is that if they are joint marital assets, her husband has an equal access and presumably equal right to access the assets unless there is some type of prenuptual agreement in place (you mentioned that it was her third husband).
I cannot stress enough how important it is to speak with an experienced Elder Law attorney who has dealt with similar issues.
Roberta S.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
If your mother has dementia, you (or another family member) can apply to the Essex County Probate Court to be appointed as your mother's conservator or guardian. A conservator has control over the "ward's" money. A guardian has control over the ward's money and makes health care decisions on her behalf. You need a Certificate from your mother's doctor stating that it is medically necessary for her to have a conservator or guardian appointed. Her husband may contest your appointment, but if you have proof that he is taking her money and not spending it for her benefit, the Court will put you in charge of her money. You can also call Elder Services if you believe that her husband is not taking proper care of her.
Steven C.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Elder abuse is a terrible problem and can be difficult to resolve. Given that your mother is married, the best way to put a stop to the abuse would be for you or someone else to become her legal guardian and conservator. This would require that you hire an attorney in Massachsetts to file the action in probate court. Otherwise you could report all of this to Protective Services. I hope that helps.
Celeste R.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
Make a report of Fraud and possible abuse (they are done anonymously) to the Adult Protective Dept in the state your mother resides You can find it by going online, and googling it thru the state.gov listings.
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I want to help some friends of my mothers (87) that have no living relatives. I can see myself helping them manage their paperwork, their mail, and paying bills. Many of my mom's elderly friends have terrible eyesight. Can I use being bonded as a protection against someone that might become disgruntled in the future?
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My Dad is 94. Some months back, his financial advisor borrowed $55,000 from my Dad. The Financial Advisor was supposed to begin paying it back months ago and so far has not paid anything back. Each month there is another excuse for non-payment.
Is this even legal? Isn't this a form of elderly abuse? Do I contact the state attorney? What can I do to help Dad out? this planner is also a deacon in our church!!
Is this even legal? Isn't this a form of elderly abuse? Do I contact the state attorney? What can I do to help Dad out? this planner is also a deacon in our church!!
Carolyn S.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
This is very likely elder exploitation as defined in criminal statutes 825.103; and civil side in the Adult protective services Act, Chapter 415.
1. call Central Abuse hotline 1-800-962-2873
2. call local law enforcement
3.
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While my elderly father was on heavy medication, a grandson who had been estranged from the family showed up and coerced my father to co-sign his student loan.
Despite not being supposed to sign any financial papers, he signed. He did this without the knowledge of his wife or family.
And while the loan was originally turned down, somehow suddenly the loan was approved. My father's grandson is now sitting home and happy to no longer having to pay loan while my parents are struggling to pay loan.
Is there a way to invalidate this signing? Is there a way to undo my father's guarantorship?
Despite not being supposed to sign any financial papers, he signed. He did this without the knowledge of his wife or family.
And while the loan was originally turned down, somehow suddenly the loan was approved. My father's grandson is now sitting home and happy to no longer having to pay loan while my parents are struggling to pay loan.
Is there a way to invalidate this signing? Is there a way to undo my father's guarantorship?
William R.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
First call the Elder Abuse hotline to see if there is anything you can do. You should call our office to make a telephone or in office appointment to discuss this further.
Marlies G.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
If father was adjudged incompetent in a guardianship hearing, then the loan should not be valid. But if it was a family agreement that he not sign any legal papers, it will be hard, fi not impossible to void the loan.
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Where can I find good Information about elder abuse and what I need to know?
Cheryl A A.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
There are many types of abuse, as well as neglect, which falls under some of the similar laws. Depending on what the issue is - is this just for information or are you suspecting someone is being abused? If they are in a nursing home, contact the facility's Ombudsman, an objective outside contact person who can help with this (their contact information should be posted prominently in the facility, as should the license).
If you are just looking for information, check this web site out:
http://www.ncea.aoa.gov/ncearoot/Main_Site/index.aspx
You may also want to find resources at the local library or if this is an urgent issue, contact Adult Protective Services - this is anonymous reporting so the caller/reporter is protected.
I hope this helps.
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I am interested in hiring a particular home health aide in Kane Country, Illinois. But an administrator of a senior facility will not let me hire the caregiver that I want. Is this acceptable. Can I get someone to help me investigate this? Who do I report this to?
Daniel P.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
I would recommend that you contact the Ombudsman for Kane County. The Ombudsman is an advocate for residents of facilities within the County. The number for the Ombudsman is 847-741-0404.
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Twice now, we have found my elderly Mom locked in her room at the Senior Living Center. The first time she was found in her room crying. The second time she was locked in she was found on the floor in her room. is this kind of treatment illegal?
John T G.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Your mother has certain rights as a resident at an assisted living facility that may be violated. I would advise you to contact an Assisted Living Ombudsman to assist you in either mediating the issue or filing an official complaint with the state.
(617) 727-7750
Patricia B.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
You should call the Ombudsmen's office immediately, this is absolutly NOT acceptable care for your Mother.
State Ombudsmen
Mary McKenna
State LTC Ombudsman
State LTC Ombudsman
Massachusetts Exec Office of Elder Affairs
1 Ashburton Place
5th Floor
Boston, MA 02108-1518
Tel: (617)727-7750
Fax: (617)727-9368
http://www.ma-elderaffairs.org
Stephen S.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
If your mother is being locked in her room, you should immediately contact an attorney to assist you. If you decide not to retain an attorney, contact your local elder abuse agency immediately.
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My father was 86-1/2 when an insurance sales person sold him a ten-year fixed annuity with my fathers $100K. Does Michigan have a law that prevents such actions?
I have POA for assets/health care for both parents and was not present at the time of the purchase.
Is there a law in Michigan that protects my elderly father in such a situation?
I have POA for assets/health care for both parents and was not present at the time of the purchase.
Is there a law in Michigan that protects my elderly father in such a situation?
Renee W.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Your local DHS office (Dept. of Human Services) has a fraud dept. in your county. There are strong elder abuse laws.
Laurel F.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
Unfortunately, if at the time the annuity was executed your father was not declared by physicians to be mentally incapable of managing his affairs the contract is likely valid. You may be able to file a complaint with the Michigan Insurance Commission, and if the sales agent had any financial planning certifications you can contact the governing body of that organization and file a complaint. But, none of this is going to undo what has been done. Many seniors are duped into these products by sales agents from "organizations" with official sounding names (e.g. The American War Veterans Association) that are merely a front for unscrupulous sales agents that convince veterans to buy these products in order to get their assets under the limit to qualify for Veterans Administration aid and attendant benefits and give the sales agent a huge commission. Thus far efforts to prosecute these organizations have been unsuccessful. Geriatric Care Managers such as myself have been actively educating and discouraging the assisted living facilities that often sponsor the "free lunch & learn" events put on by these "organizations". An attorney could advise you whether you could file a civil suit against the sales agent and what your powers are to act on your father's behalf with the documents you have in place.
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My Social Security and Medicare cards have been stolen. What do I have to do to replace them?
Jehnell G.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
You need to contact your local Social Security office for replacement. Expect to have to produce identification before they replace your cards.
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Someone who lives near me in Bushwick is, I believe being abused by her son. The son is 31 years old and the mother is 67 years old. He is a danger to his mother in that he does not let her sleep when he is playing music all the time. I have reason to believe that the abuse may be physical or worse.
Home attendants in the home do know what is going on but have told me that they do not want to get involved.
My neighbor has told me she wished she was dead and doesn't want to live with her son who she thinks needs to go to a mental hospital.
I have already called the hotline of family justice (718 250-5111) and left a message. What else can I do, anonymously, to remove my neighbor or her son from one another?
David L.
, answers:
Consider contacting NYC Adult Protective Services, website address is http://www.nyc.gov/html/hra/html/directory/adult.shtml
Jeffrey G A.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Report the abuse to Adult Protective Services, a City agency that has lawyers, social workers, and doctors on staff. One part of the facts may indicate there may be some question as to the extent of the abuse. Home care workers that are employed by licensed agencies are required to report the abuse to their employer who is then under an obligation to call Adult Protective Services.
I hope this is of some health.
Sandra B.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Seek guardianship. In meantime call Police. You so not need to become the guardian. Call HRA and have them start petition.
Sonya M.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Nothing. PSA will intestigate. The only other way wouldbe to seek guardianshipover the mother, but that cannot be done anymously
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I know of a situation where a son takes advantage of mother's unstable mental state of mind and:
1- gives her holistic heart medication from a magazine mail order company and not her prescribed medication.
2- confiscates her monies from her regularly for personal usage (spends little on her and most on self and his holistic business) confiscated over several thousands over the past years.
Am I correct that there are legal actions that can be charged against him for elder abuse / neglect. Is he also liable for promoting harm to the elderly by providing non-prescribed medication with no proven results?
I am sorry to say, but I want to inform to someone about the violations that I see. Whom should I approach? What are the risks to me?
LaTonya M.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
I would suggest contacting your area Adult Protective Service. They would investigate the situation to determine if the son has legal POA and if the client lack capacity to make her own decisions.
Carol G.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Sadly, if the mother is a competent individual, then she can make decisions for herself, even if they are bad decisions. So unless she is judged to be incompetent, she can choose to take the hollistic medicine in place of prescribed medicine and give away her money to her child.
However, you can always call the adult protective services group in your area and make a complaint. Hopefully, they can make an investigation into the situation. You can make the complaint anonymously so I do not think there will be any risk to you. I hope this helps!
Deborah S.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
protective services,area agency on aging should be contacted and they will investigate the situation. would need to know if mom has been deemed incompetent. if not, this could be pursued and an emergency guardianship possible granted. Protective Services does this. if mom is not demented/incompetent then it is business between she and her son.
Laurie B.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Every state has a department devoted to protecting the elderly, sometimes referred to as Adult Protective Services. A complaint can be lodged with the APS in the elderly person's county or city. The complaint can usually be made anonymously.
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My Mother is 83 years old and is a widow. My younger brother is 44 and interested in seeing her will and life insurance policies, etc. At this point, however, my mother is totally all together and I find my brother to be quite sinister. What should I do?
Jan S.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
I agree with the Attorney who recommends your mom seek legal consultation just to ensure everything is current and to her wishes. If your "all together " mother is interested in sharing her information with her family, I would recommend that all of her children be present. Thus, everyone hears the same information.
Marty B.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Because you say your mom is "all together" there is not much that you personally can do. But your mom is under no obligation to provide copies of her will and trust or other estate planning documents to your brother, unless there is an irrevocable trust and your brother is a beneficiary.
It would be wise to have your mother visit with an experianced elder law attorney to make sure all of the documents are current and appropriate for her needs.
Look for an attorney who is a member of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneies. www.NAELA.ORG
It is reasonable however for an adult child to be concerned that their parents estate planning is current and taken care of. But it is not ok for the same child to demand copies of the documents to which he is not entitled.
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My father gets a social security check but that check has gone missing on a couple of occasions. Is there a way to make that SSI check directly deposit into his bank account so that this check will not keep disappearing?
William B.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
Re: Elder Fraud
There are 2 ways to arrrange for dierect deposit of an SSI check, one is to go onto the Social Security website or call your local Social Security office. Moreover, you should also report the missing checks.
Patricia C.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
The local bank that your father uses has the ability to have his check deposited directly into his account. This will elimated the chance the check will come up missing in the future. If your father still handles his financial matters he can have this done, or maybe with your assistance. If your father has appointed someone to manage his finances this person can work with the bank to make the checks come direct deposit. Best of luck and I wish you well.
Doina F.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
Yes, you can make a direct deposit for the SSI check. You need to contact the Social Security office and talk to them about direct deposit.
Joanne F.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
Yes, simply call SSI office and request direct deposit. This can be done on the phone with your father present--he needs to identify himself and give permission to have this happen. The government will move to this eventually, hence telling your father to do this now sets him up for the future.
Debbie S.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
You can call Social Security directly with your father available to give you permission to talk to them. There is a toll free #, have the bank account # AND the routing # readily available for them.
Nancy F.
, Nurse and Care Manager answers:
Here is a link to help you.
Also, contact your father's bank. They may also be able to assist with this.
Drew E.
, Elderlaw Attorney answers:
Yes, he, or his designated POA, can get the check sent direct deposit.
Deborah P.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
He or the person that is designated as his Power of Attorney can request that Social Security Admin electronically deposit his check into his acct.
Marilyn K.
, Geriatric Care Manager answers:
The daughter must contact the Social Security office and inquire about the process for direct deposit with his bank.
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